• Read The Cycle of Change

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    The Cycle of Change

    The other day I decided to step down as an organizer for a women’s group I founded several years ago.  The decision was a long time coming and was bittersweet.  It was a fantastic experience, and yet intuitively I knew it was time to move on.  I think years ago I would have held on longer and pushed myself to muddle on.  Quite often the things we take on become a big part of our identity.  Sometimes the hardest decision to make is when to let go. The 4 Cycles of Change And this got me thinking about the cycle of change, which I often refer to as a deck of cards.  And when you think about how a game plays out, there are 4 phases: The Shuffle Phase of Change Shuffle – in this phase we’re wondering what game we want to play.  We’re thinking about the options that might be on the table.  Perhaps we’re thinking of transitioning our career or learning something new.  There’s often excitement, but there’s often a lot of fear, a lot of trepidation.  What if I make the wrong choice?  What if I make a mistake?  What if it doesn’t work out?  What if I embarrass myself?  We may find this phase to be exhilarating if we’re focused on all the possibilities and opportunities that may manifest, or our inner saboteur may be rearing its ugly head.  Or both at the same time.  We may find ourselves paralyzed by inaction as we are overwhelmed by the possibilities. The Deal Phase of Change Deal – in this phase we’ve chosen the game we wish to play, and we start to signal our intent.  We are making our first move, so to speak.  A lot of excitement again potentially, and a lot of potential for inner turmoil.  But the difference is we are now committed.  We are taking action, the ship is starting to move in a certain direction, although the path may not be completely known.  In this phase we might feel quite unsteady, some days we might feel like we’ve made great progress and other days maybe we feel we’ve gone backwards.  Our emotions will most likely be a mixed bag – there will be wins and successes as we start to make our moves, and there will be setbacks.  The choice of how we ultimately respond to these is up to us. The Play Phase of Change Play – in this phase we are all in.  We’re playing to win, to succeed, we’ve defined what success looks like.  We know the drill, we can handle the inconveniences that may come along the way.  Of the 4 cycles, this is the one that is the most stable.  The problem with the play phase is that sometimes we stay too long.  We may have a tendency to overplay our hand.  We might find ourselves eventually becoming bored, stagnant or lacking purpose or meaning in our endeavor.  Maybe we crash and burn.  But we hold […]

    November 4, 2022

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    4.4 min read

  • Read Is There Such a Thing as Too Safe?

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    Is There Such a Thing as Too Safe?

    The Pernot household is no stranger to the importance of safety.  My husband, having worked in construction for years, lives and breathes it, as he is acutely aware that every day he is responsible for the lives and well-being of his crew.  And moi, having worked in large, manufacturing companies for a great portion of my career, safety has always been a common mantra.  And in my not so humble opinion that’s a very good thing. Having led leadership development workshops for years, most mornings we start out with a safety moment – a great way to remind others to be vigilant and mindful when we silly humans have a dangerous tendency to switch onto autopilot.  Over the years I’ve learned a lot about process safety in a high-risk environment, as well as the terrifying danger of escalators in suburban shopping malls (stay away from those things if you’re wearing sandals people – just saying…) But I’ve started noticing something interesting that’s been popping up in just about every interaction I’ve been having lately, even before COVID-19 appeared so unapologetically and intrusively onto the scene.  Instead of signing off an email or conversation with “sincerely,” or “thanks” or “see you soon,” I’m increasingly being met with the closing phrase of “be safe” or “stay safe.” Turn on the TV, and dangers are everywhere.  We’re reminded daily of the fact that the world we live in is very much less than perfect.  Behind every shrubbery lurks a child molester, or a would-be burglar, intent on stealing our precious worldly possessions.  We install sophisticated security systems, cameras, doorbells like Ring with the capability to monitor and survey 24/7.  Instead of using the electronic neighborhood bulletin boards to foster community and fellowship, we post blurry pictures of ominous shadowed would be assassins and the offending dog owner that always allows Fluffy to do his business in our perfectly manicured lawn (Jerk!  I’m watching you…). Ironically, we’ve never been safer.  In a recent New York Times Best-Seller, The Coddling of the American Mind:  How Good Intentions and Bad Ideas are Setting Up a Generation for Failure, Lukinahoff and Haidt lay out a compelling and research based case for how we have embraced a culture of “safetyism,” a dangerous trend that impedes an adult’s capacity to navigate the bumpy road of life, despite the fact that we live in a safer than ever before world.  The result is a generation (and overwhelming larger and larger part of the population) who are increasingly “triggered” by every little thing, aided by the very well-intentioned helicopter mom, lawnmower parent, or whatever they are called these days. (You know you’re guilty…) I have often wondered if our environment has evolved much more quickly than our brains have.  A hundred or so years ago (which really isn’t long in the grand scheme of the planet) things were very different.  My husband’s grandmother’s obituary read like a lifetime movie.  Born in France in the early 1900’s, her father died in WW1, […]

    April 14, 2020

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    4.3 min read

  • Read The (Scary) Sound of Silence

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    The (Scary) Sound of Silence

    If you’re like most folks, you’re caught up in a perpetual tailspin.  A crammed diary filled with meeting after meeting with barely enough time to shove in a lukewarm sandwich in-between, or after school activities for the kids, school run, volunteer activities, endless lists of chores that only seem to get longer and longer.  The first response to the question “How are you?” is typically something in the order of, “I’ve just been so busy!  There’s just never enough time to get everything done!” or my personal favorite “Frazzled!”  Or maybe this is just the strange universe I hang out in.  Never having been one to jump on the bandwagon, folks often look confused when I don’t respond back in agreement.  I’ve often wondered if there is something wrong with me. When I lived in the UK, making it into someone’s personal diary was a point of distinction, a barrier to be overcome, as spots in it were tightly guarded and highly coveted.  Brits in general, not being as spontaneous as their American cousins across the pond, tend to respond to the question of “when should we get together again,” with things like – “let me check my diary and get back to you.  The next three months are mad, just mad!” (Mind you, this could also be their subtle and polite way of blowing annoying Americans off, but typically we’re too stupid to notice this.) But while we might, on the surface, spend a lot of time complaining about this busy thing, I’ve often wondered if deep down we secretly like it.  Perhaps being busy has become the new badge of honor, a justification for our existence.  If we are busy, we are doing something with our lives.  Our life must have some meaning, some deep purpose, something greater than taking out the trash and watching the next season of Ozarks on Netflix, thrilling though it may be. I myself have even reveled in this practice from time to time, secretly gloating to myself that I have so many client engagements on my schedule that it would be impossible for me to meet with such and such person for the next couple of months. Well, not anymore, thanks to Corona virus. So here’s the question, in a life that’s filled with activity after activity, what do you do with yourself when the tailspin finally ends and sound of silence finally comes? I mean, you can only rearrange your closet and shop on amazon so much.  I was talking to a friend of mine the other day, who lives in Orange County, CA.  The eternal optimist, she mused that perhaps this might be a good opportunity for society to finally slow down, and smell the proverbial roses, so to speak.  The eternal realist that I am reminded her that many of us (present company included) will most likely lose work, maybe even their jobs, and these days will be filled with worry and anxiety of what to do after the […]

    March 23, 2020

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    3.9 min read

  • Read Goodbye My One Good Habit

    Uncategorized, Well Being, Yoga

    Goodbye My One Good Habit

    So far I’d been coping like a trooper.  For instance, I hadn’t the slightest bit of concern about the run on toilet paper.  And despite client cancellation after cancellation in my leadership development training diary, I still hold faith that these events will eventually be rescheduled, albeit it may take some time.  I don’t care what the so-called experts say, I plainly refuse to believe that training and leadership development has been relegated to a computer screen for the rest of eternity. In a quest to use this “time off” to my advantage, I had mentally started to compile a list of all the things I would like to do for my business I had been avoiding:  do my taxes, clean up my files, update my coaching log for the International Coaching Federation – a super tedious task I’ve been avoiding for over a year and even start my blog up again.  Like many small business owners I had enthusiastically embraced the blogging and posting practice back in 2015 when I started my leadership training and coaching business, determined to change the world with my inspirational messages and quotes, carefully curated from conscious thought leaders, placed cleverly on calming meme backgrounds like a babbling brook or a starlight sky, and scheduled strategically on apps such as hootsuite to ensure maximum audience attention.  After about six months of lackluster results I abandoned the practice in a fitful rage, convinced that social media in all its forms was one gigantic scam as well as the downfall of our modern mindless society, perpetuated by higher ups to get us to publicly humiliate ourselves. But this morning the impossible happened.  This morning I finally hit the wall.  The meltdown I had been unconsciously teetering on the edge of for the last two weeks finally materialized. The cause?  My local yoga studio temporarily shut its doors, the most recent business to fall prey to the corona virus meltdown. I’ve been practicing hot yoga for over ten years now.  Since I began my practice in 2009, it’s been the one constant in my life.  The longest running positive habit I have.  The only long running positive habit I have, I might add. I’ve had loads of negative habits over the years.  I’m really good at these I must say.  I smoked a pack of cigarettes a day for 14 years, it was only nine weeks of grueling yoga teacher training that finally got me to quit.  Happy hour was always a convenient excuse to avoid doing the things I knew I needed to do at work or at home, under the guise of 50% off appetizers and trying the newest exciting craft cocktail at a downtown hipster bar.  I’ve been biting my nails on and off since I was a child, although I did manage to give up my favorite stained, smelly, blue crocheted blankie at age 8.  I suppose that’s a plus.  I have what one might call a serious addiction to tex mex queso […]

    March 17, 2020

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    3.7 min read

  • Read Discover Your Purpose Again With A Life Coach

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    Discover Your Purpose Again With A Life Coach

    What Is Your Purpose? Do you have trouble answering that question? Are you unsure of what you should be working toward everyday, your drive to do your best? Do you struggle to find motivation because your goals are undefined and unclear? Shelley Pernot, your local Life Coach in Austin, is here to help. It’s Easy To Start Your Journey With a Life Coach Life Coaching doesn’t have to be a difficult or a confusing process to start. Shelley has been trained on helping clients feel at ease from beginning to end, guiding them to find their purpose. She knows that life coaching isn’t textbook-driven or a data heavy process, it’s a skill that requires a personalized scope of action and a motivation to support you however you need.   Prioritization Is Key Everyone knows that life can sometimes be overwhelming, but you can tackle everything if you cross out the to-do list one by one. During your life coach sessions with Shelley, she will walk you through the process of prioritizing. She will help you understand what tasks are most important to you specifically and which tasks should follow. We often find ourselves buried in questions unsure of how to dive into the obstacles at hand; with Shelley’s help, you can navigate optimistically. No problem is too big. Everything Falls Into Place When you have an understanding of what you need to do in order to thrive, you can succeed. When you know who you are and how to make yourself happy, you can find the type of happiness you deserve. When you have a grasp on why you struggle to find purpose, you will know how to take the right kind of action to set you free. Once you are conscious, everything falls into place.   Are You Ready To Hire Your Life Coach? Shelley Pernot has dedicated her career to discovering and understanding the ways to optimize your life and helping others find their purpose. To get a glimpse into her methods, follow this link to download your free copy of chapter two of her book, Running on Empty, The Irreverent Guru’s Guide to Filling up with Mindfulness. If you are ready to see for yourself how a life coach can help you take control of your life again, schedule your free 30-minute consultation with Shelley today by filling out this contact form. The best time of your life is knocking at your door, don’t wait any longer.

    August 16, 2017

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    2.1 min read

  • Read Find Your Happiness Through Your Life Coach

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    Find Your Happiness Through Your Life Coach

    Never Settle for Less Than What You Deserve Do you sometimes feel like you’ve settled for less than you deserve or less than you hoped for? Do you try everything possible to “make the best of the situation” and just hope the situation fixes itself over time? This is unlikely going to happen because making changes like this take time and effort, but you don’t have to do it alone. You can hire a life coach to be your guiding light.  Teamwork Really Can Make the Dream Work Happiness comes in all shapes and sizes, but at times it can be hard to find if you are experiencing loneliness in various aspects of your life. Even when you’re surrounded by your loving family and energetic kids or your supportive boss and friendly co-workers, you could still feel like a party of one. The old saying “teamwork makes the dream work” is absolutely true when it comes to living your best life. Sometimes a coach is all you need to give you that extra pep talk on improving your daily routine. With me, Shelley Pernot, as your life coach, you will never be alone. Not Just Today, Every Day When you hire me as your life coach, our partnership doesn’t end after your first session; I’m here for you every step of the way. You know as well as I do, changes take time and we will take action on every aspect of your life you are looking to improve. We will create realistic goals and milestones along the way. We will work together to empower you to be the best you can be. Take Back Your Life with A Life Coach Our parents, teachers and mentors tell us we should make the most of every day, but the “how” can only be discovered by you. We spend our whole lives trying to be our happiest and to lead a fulfilling life, but sometimes we can lose track and go astray. We buy a new car, we get a new job, we go on an extravagant vacation, along with many other things that we think can make us happy. More often than not, tangible things like these aren’t what will make us happy in the long run; it’s those intangible mindsets and enhanced personal perceptions that will stick with us down the road. You can look to a life coach to guide you in figuring these things out, we specialize in finding those inherent passions.     Today Is the Day. Contact Shelley To Get Started! If you are trying to find your happiness again, life coaching could take you there. Shelley Pernot has spent her career working with people helping to turn their lives around – you could be next. If you are interested in learning more about Shelley’s coaching methods, click this link to download your free copy of chapter two of her new book, Running on Empty, The Irreverent Guru’s Guide to Filling Up with Mindfulness. She is also […]

    July 18, 2017

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    2.7 min read